NURTURING YOURSELF, NURTURING OTHERS, AND ACCEPTING THE NURTURING OF OTHERS
Nurturing is a vital part of personal potentiation. It is important that we learn not only to nurture ourselves and to nurture others, but we must learn to accept and be grateful for nurturing when it comes into our lives. One of the best ways to nurture yourself and others is by expressing gratitude daily. You can nurture other by sending gratitude wishes.
Because of the way our lives may have been lived up to now, we may have a wide variety of responses to the nurturing experience. The concept of nurturing itself may be foreign in our lives because we have never received it or never saw significant others doing it. Some simply do not believe that it is real. We may see others hugging, kissing, holding, petting, etc., and feel that it is phony, not real, etc.
What is nurturing and how is nurturing gleaned into our lives?
First of all we must begin with the three ways we learn things:
METHOD 1 – Physically
We physically experience holding, touching, caresses, etc. which become part of our physical memory bank of things we are capable of doing or receiving physically. In a loving family we learn it is okay to feel love, to enjoy closeness and to be joyous to be with family members. I am very grateful I learned to nurture as a child by being in a loving family.
METHOD 2 – Mentally
Mental learning is to know how to nurture and be aware that we know how. These are the skills such as remembering to feed the baby at a certain interval, to take a warm bath or give yourself a foot or hand massage. We may even be able to describe how others do these acts. But we still have to make the choice to do them. In a loving family we learn how to do these things by seeing out parents and other family members doing them and learning how to be caring. I watched how my grandmother acted. When a child came by hungry she always fed them. She took in many children when they needed a place to stay. She never sent anyone away hungry. We had a food route where we took food to 20 families each Saturday and Sunday.
METHOD 3 – Spiritually
Spiritual learning is that which we allow to flow into our subconscious mind which then becomes a part of our self-esteem memory bank. We learn what we are permitted to accept and to do. These are the things we are not only physically capable of doing and mentally aware of happening, but we chose to do them. Spiritual nurturing allows these activities to touch us inwardly so we feel them. The feeling may accompany our body, visual or aural sensations such as massage or physical training, art, architecture and music.
These are things we actively allow to permeate our beingness such as giving ourselves over to a love experience or a great concert. We allow ourselves to be affected within or changed. We pull these activities out of our self-esteem memory bank and give ourselves an energy lift to get a feeling of well-being. I was brought in a strong church family and learned about giving and receiving and doing for others.
Each of the above three levels affects us differently. If we look at these things in a nested fashion, like Chinese dolls, we will see the accumulative effect they have on us.
.
These are three components of nurturing
Self-nurturing in which we give to ourselves or perform acts to build our personal self esteem
Nurturing others in which we perform acts of love and self- esteem building for others
Receiving nurturing from others in which we allow others to give to us and we are able to accept the acts of love or self-esteem building from others.
Each of these three components are mediated within us at various levels:
Reject: We do not nurture ourselves, allow ourselves to be nurtured, or nurture others
Punish: We choose to punish ourselves, either by not accepting the nurturing or using nurturing in a hurtful way
Ignore: The action may physically be done to us but we ignore it (escape to other thoughts)
Allow: We allow the action to happen to us at each level without having reactions or responses
Accept: We accept activities that come to us and gain energy and self-esteem points from it in a passive way
Choose: We actively choose to be nurtured, to nurture or to give ourselves nurturing
Seek: We create a plan to find more and more nurturing activities and actively seek these experiences for ourselves and for others.
A key part to becoming successful in nurturing is to reward ourselves. So we use nurturing in our personal reward system. You tally nurturing of yourself, nurturing of others and accepting nurturing as key components of your personal reward system. You keep track of your nurturing experiences through the Personal Triumph File. You specifically note your nurturing experiences.
In order to reward ourselves, we develop a system where we can know what reward we deserve. That is why each nurturing experience is listed each day and tabulated.
Possible values on the tally card for nurturing.
NURTURING LEVEL OF
ACTIVITY ACCEPTANCE Points
Reject -2
Punish -1
Ignore 0
Allow +1
Accept +2
Choose +3
Seek +4
EXAMPLES OF SELF-NURTURING:
Physical
Foot rub, massage, hot bath, rest, personal grooming, play physical games, walk, fish, swim, meditate, take a bubble bath, enjoy something I like, put lotion on myself, have a cup of tea and relax
Mental
I enjoy watching sports, read pleasure books, business information, real estate, investment information, support nonprofit activities
Spiritual
I told myself I was good, told my body I loved it, read spiritual book, listened to uplifting tapes, spoke denials, memorized an affirmation, listened to positive tapes, watched positive video tapes, studied writings, studied a lesson, said my prayers, turned off TV. I tell myself I am good, feel love for myself, praise myself for improving; tell my body I love it, smile at myself in the mirror, say something good to myself, praise myself for what I do, attend meetings.
EXAMPLES OF NURTURING SOMEONE ELSE
Physical
Give a foot rub, a massage, or prepare a hot bath. Enable herm (him or her) to rest. Help with personal grooming, play physical games together, walk together. Fish, swim, meditate, and/or enjoy something you like together. Put lotion on herm, serve tea and relax together.
Mental
Enjoy watching sports together, playing board games, reading to each other. Work together in business, real estate, and in gathering investment information. Become involved and support nonprofit activities together.
Spiritual
Tell herm positive things, that you love herm, study spiritual books together. Together listen to uplifting tapes, speak denials, memorize affirmations, listen to positive tapes, watch positive video tapes, study writings, study lessons, pray, turn off TV and spend time together. Tell each other that you see much good in each other, that you feel love for each other. Praise improvement, tell herm you love herm body (when appropriate), smile at herm. Praise herm for specific acts, attend meetings together. Tell herm how nice herm looks, invite a friend to dinner. Encourage a friend in times of need. Listen to a child's prayers. Compliment someone at work. Guide someone away from danger or inappropriate behavior. Speak kindly, touch herm lovingly, cheer herm up, visit someone who needs you.
You can do something each day to help someone else.
EXAMPLES OF ACCEPTING NURTURING
Receive or share in any of the above items listed under "Nurture Someone Else" plus others that occur to you and which are meaningful to you.
Nurturing is vital to create a self-esteem building community. Every act of nurturing builds self-esteem.
Find out more about nurturing from:
International
Gratitude Empowerment Institute, Inc
Phone 305-788-5563
Email
gratitude@solarentrep.com
Lorrayne Dee Brightman, M.A,
Vice President
Phone 954-298-9818
Email
dee_brightman2000@yahoo.com
Carol Cross, PhD, President
Church of the Faith Master
Dr. Carol Cross,
Visionary Messenger & Honored Leader
Lorrayne Dee Brightman,
Praise Leader &
Honored
Leader
No comments:
Post a Comment